Reviews May Contain Minor Spoilers

If you're reading a review you should expect to hear some spoilers. I try to keep them to a minimum though.

Thursday, 31 January 2013


So, for my 69th review post I give you:

Zardoz (1974) is a bizarre science fiction film that tries to be deep.

We open with a floating head wearing a blue habit with a drawn on mustache and goatee. He tells us about his story of the future full of irony. We jump to 2293 and see warriors gathering in some hills praising Zardoz. A giant stone head floats down and gives a speech that boils down to “The gun is good. The penis is evil” before spewing guns at the savages. We then focus on Sean Connery who points the gun at the screen and shoots us.

Zardoz is one of those legendarily bad films that people talk about. With good reason. It is about the fall of utopian (distopian) society of godlike people called eternals. As the eternals become more bored they slip into stwo types: the apathetics are completely passive and the renegades are mad. “Welcome to paradise."

Our Hero 
Zed is a ‘brutal’ who escapes from the outlands to the land of the eternals. He is an exterminator and some kind of a leader of his savage clan. He’s made a pet by the eternals, but his true motive remains hidden. When it’s revealed, it makes the more sense than anything that follows.

Eternal Observers 
Friend is a more hostile Eternal. He shows Zed the darker sides to the Eternal’s paradise. I think he was the most enjoyable character of the film while maintaining its required weirdness quota.

Consuella is the leader of the Eternals and kind of a bitch. However, it is up to Zed to try and melt her heart. Yay, the bitchy leader stereotype.

May is the kind scientist who discovers Zed’s true purpose. She doesn't do much other than act as an advocate for Zed.

Arthur Frayn aka Zadoz claims to be a trickster. Zardoz shoots him and he falls from the mouth of Zardoz. He's just weird. He walks in and out of the story serving mostly as an exposition machine and plot facilitator.

Weird Atmosphere 
Zardoz tries to be an overly pretentious art film, but comes off as more of a B movie. There are some quotable lines: “You murdered your own God by accident. Or was it an accident?” Sadly, the gaudy set and costume designs and mass amount of dictation and weird flashbacks make this film difficult to watch straight through.

In the End 
Big gunfight. Happy Family. Sort of...

The biggest crime of this film is trying to be too mysterious while including long sections of exposition. This film explains almost too much of itself. It leaves some things to be interpreted, but not enough of the interesting stuff is left to really care. It has some great quotes, but not enough for me to really recommend it. Check out some clips on youtube and save your time for a deeper movie.

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